It feels like yesterday I was writing my article for festive season 2023. The years seem to go so fast yet the days so slow! How are the holidays shaping up for you? How are you feeling as you read the word ‘Christmas’ everywhere and hear Mariah Carey on repeat throughout the shopping centres? It can bring up very different emotions for everyone. Whilst it is a beautiful and joyous time of year to be with family and friends it also comes with a lot of added stress, and I mean this in particular for parents. What is your idea of balance?
Let’s break down the elements and see if you can relate (but please keep reading to the end to hear the flip side of it all!)
- School is finishing, the kids are exhausted and you’re trying to attend all the concerts, functions and also be a stand-up committee member for the school.
- Holidays are amazing but the endless need to entertain the kids and keep them active is tough so you’re trying to nut out if it’s worth booking holiday programmes and if so which one? When?
- You’ve had a little voice on your shoulder for the last 3 months telling you to pre-order presents, get organised this year but again, the rush to the end is real and you’re frustrated at yourself.
- Family dynamics are looming again, where will Christmas be? Who’s bringing what?
- The work functions are never ending, and you forgot to buy your snatchy Santa present.
- The cost of filling the Christmas sacks is adding up and trying to convince the kids Christmas isn’t about gifts keeps backfiring.
- You’ve got the tree up but it’s nowhere near as big or wonderful as ‘Maddy’s tree down the road’ (or so your daughter keeps telling you).
- You’re trying to wrap up work, finish projects and remember to send clients a little gift to say ‘happy holidays’ and your brain is on the verge of explosion.
Any of this sounds familiar? It’s so hard not to get overwhelmed this time of year and sometimes hard to remember what’s important and what you should prioritise. With each child I have and each year they get older the Christmas pressure rises and on top of all the above the mum guilt for organising sitters and juggling your social life and something for ‘you’ boils over. How do people do it?
When I went to start this article, I wanted it to be relatable – I wanted to make whoever reads this feel seen and heard and just remind them that everyone is juggling 10,000 balls right now and even ‘Jenny down the road with the perfect tree and Santa sleigh out front’ is trying to keep up with the Jones’s too.
So, how do we fix this mentality? How do we slow down, breathe, and create a gentler approach to the festive season? I’d be lying if I said I had all the answers because anyone whose knows me knows I operate at a million miles an hour and I find it hard to pull myself out of the chaos. I think as parents it can be hard to take your foot off the pedal even if you know its better for you because whilst we live in the most fortunate of societies there is a lot of pressure to ‘do it all.’
So how can we change this? A simple one liner we’ve all used before. ‘Less is more.’ Literally in every sense of the word.
- Less presents means less pressure, less financial strain.
- Less gatherings means less social anxiety and organisational strain.
- Less alcohol means less grogginess and foggy brain.
Lets focus on quality, not quantity. Now, I’m not saying boycott Christmas, ABSOLUTELY not. My girls will still be opening presents and getting into the festivities, but the point is having the power to say No. This is a concept I will always grapple with but each time I lessen things, even just a little, I feel a little bit lighter.
I think it’s important at this point to highlight the above and turn the attitude around. How lucky we are to have these pressures in a sense? To have our kids in school, to be able to give them a beautiful festive Christmas, to work, to have socials lives, to prioritise finding the perfect turkey for a feast with family and friends. It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of it all and lose a bit of the magic so I hope you’ve read to this point to hear this bit.
How do we slow down and remember what’s important? Listen, listen to those who find Christmas tough. This will be my second year doing Christmas without my mum. Last year was raw and painful and I got through it by going above and beyond to make it exactly like she use to and it was stressful. This year, I’ve had to soften the approach. You can’t do it all and I have my own little family to focus on so It’s the first year me and my 3 brothers won’t have our own ‘sacks’ (can you believe that?) My eldest brother is 40 this year and we still had sacks… even last year as she was so organised, she had bought Christmas presents for us before she died. That’s just who she was no matter how many years we told her to stop. So, this year is a year of change and perhaps finding some new traditions whilst honouring her old ones. But the sacks are not needed, the love is all we need. Christmas will always have something missing now but this is the price we pay for love, how lucky were we to have that magic she created?
What to take away from this:
- Less is more.
- The power of saying no.
- Flip the attitude (easier said than done I know!)
- Listen to others to stay grounded.
- Give back
Christmas is magic, I still love it despite the heartache and if this has got you thinking and perhaps wanting to change your approach a little, I’ve done my job. Go connect with a friend who’s maybe finding it hard, relax on the amount of presents just a tad this year or gather some to give to those who may need it more than you this Christmas. Hawaiian partners with Foodbank for the Giving Box campaign and people can donate nonperishable food items for those doing it tough this Christmas. You can find one of the big Gold Giving Boxes at Claremont Quarter and donate there or simply tap to pay a donation on the side too.
To finish in the theme of lessening stress! I’ve taken it upon myself to gather a few fun things happening around Perth to help lighten the load as a parent in trying to fill the festive season days. There are so many amazing events on and I believe it’s going to these and getting involved in the community that really creates the Christmas spirit for kids.
I’ll leave with my go to salad for Christmas day (Which my mum loved!) Its fresh, healthy and involves my favourite part of Christmas lunch – Seafood! Check it out below, try not to let the overwhelm of Christmas get the better of you and enjoy your time with those who mean most to you. Merry Christmas!
Salad with Freekeh
Ingredients (14)
- 200g freekeh
- 16 cooked king prawns, peeled
- 1 small iceberg lettuce, cut into wedges
- 2 ripe peaches, cut into wedges
- 2 bunches asparagus, trimmed, blanched, halved lengthwise
- 250g mixed cherry tomatoes, halved
- 2 buffalo mozzarella balls, drained, torn
- 1/2 cup each basil & mint leaves
- Crushed pistachios & finely grated lemon zest, to serve
Orange vinaigrette
- Juice & finely grated zest of 1/2 orange
- Juice of 1 lemon
- 1 tbs red wine vinegar, or to taste
- 1/3 cup (80ml) extra virgin olive oil
- 1 small garlic clove, finely grated
Method
- Place freekeh in a saucepan of boiling salted water and cook for 40-45 minutes until tender. Drain well, then rinse under cold running water and spread on a tray to dry.
- For the orange vinaigrette, combine ingredients in a jar, season to taste and shake well to combine.
- Combine prawns, lettuce, peach, asparagus, tomato and freekeh in a large bowl, drizzle with vinaigrette to taste and toss lightly to combine. Arrange on a platter and scatter with mozzarella, basil and mint. Drizzle with a little extra vinaigrette and scatter with crushed pistachios and lemon rind to serve.
